


There Will Come Soft Rains

by enigmaticblue



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-15
Updated: 2010-12-15
Packaged: 2017-10-13 16:42:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/139427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enigmaticblue/pseuds/enigmaticblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It had been a rotten couple of weeks, beginning with getting stranded on the Prometheus, and ending with barely surviving Anubis’ drone at the beta site. Her dad’s farewell was just icing on the cake, really.</p>
            </blockquote>





	There Will Come Soft Rains

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the hc_bingo prompt, “stranded/survival scenario”. The title is from a Sara Teasdale poem by the same name.

She feels as though she’s been running forever; she’s trying to calm her breathing, trying to be quiet, crouched down behind a thick tree trunk. It won’t provide much cover, but she just needs a little time to catch her breath, and then she can go on. If she evades Anubis’ drone long enough—

 

Sam wakes to find Colonel O’Neill standing by her bed as though he’s just arrived or is just leaving.

 

“Hey,” O’Neill says with an enigmatic smile. “Doc says she’s letting you out on good behavior.”

 

Sam tries to summon up an answering smile, but the expression on the colonel’s face suggests she isn’t that successful. “So I hear.”

 

“Did Jacob tell you about the Tok’ra and Jaffa?” Jack asks.

 

“Daniel filled me in,” Sam replies. “It sounds pretty bad.”

 

“We’ll make it through.”

 

Sam isn’t sure she shares O’Neill’s assurance. It’s taking her a little longer than usual to shake off the fear, the fight or flight response that had kept her moving at the beta site.

 

“Sure we will,” she says, projecting as much certainty as she can.

 

O’Neill nods, satisfied. “You did good, Carter.”

 

She shakes her head, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice when she says, “I wouldn’t have survived if you hadn’t shown up when you did, sir.”

 

“Carter—”

 

“We both know it’s true.”

 

O’Neill clasps her shoulder. “Now, listen to me. You blew that drone up with a downed UAV. There aren’t a lot of people who can say the same.”

 

“Sir—”

 

“Just because the son of a bitch didn’t stay dead doesn’t negate what you did.” O’Neill overrides her protests easily. “ _You stayed alive_. That’s all anybody can ask, Carter. I’m just glad the cavalry arrived in time.”

 

He gives her shoulder one last squeeze and says, “I’ll see you in a few days, Major.”

 

The absence of the colonel’s hand leaves her cold, and Sam remembers how his arm had felt around her. She’d been in shock, unable to believe that she was alive, but O’Neill’s presence had been a touchstone, grounding her.

 

The nurse clears Sam to leave shortly after that, and she limps off to collect her civvies from the locker room. She stares at her clothing, unable to remember when she’d last worn it.

 

Sam feels as though she’s been running forever, as though the last few weeks have been one long exercise in survival. Sam feels tears sting her eyes, and she sits down hard on the bench.

 

Improbably, stupidly, Sam wants her dad. She wants to hear him say he’s proud of her one more time, just to know that he has her back. Sam had gotten used to working with him, to having him around, and she misses him so much right now, in this moment of weakness, that her eyes sting.

 

Her dad had said not to worry about it, and she knows that’s part of him being a father, but by the time Sam had caught up, he was gone. She’d been in no shape to ask him questions while he’d been visiting, and now it could be months before she sees him again.

 

From what she’s been told, it could be _years_. The Tok’ra don’t have the same sense of time humans do.

 

Sam can’t have her dad, though, and she can’t have the colonel, and she feels like Sisyphus, always pushing the boulder up the hill, only to have it roll back down again.

 

She starts as she feels someone sit down on the bench next to her.

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay in the infirmary another night?” Janet asks.

 

Sam shakes her head. “I’m fine. You know I’ll recover better in my own bed.”

 

“Yeah, but you’re still jumpy.”

 

Sam sighs. “I’m just having trouble shaking this one. Every time I open my eyes—I don’t know. And before you ask, I’m seeing the base psychologist.”

 

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” Janet replies.

 

Sam gives her a look. “Yeah, right.”

 

“Acting as your doctor, I released you from the infirmary,” Janet says. “Speaking as your friend, though…”

 

“Speaking as my friend, then, have you ever felt like you’re just running a survival scenario over and over again, and there’s no way out?”

 

“That’s how you’re feeling?”

 

“I’m just saying that I’ve had way too many near-death experiences recently,” Sam replies. “And this last time, before the colonel and Teal’c showed up, I was sure I was going to die.”

 

“You had a close call, Sam,” Janet says. “What you’re feeling is normal.”

 

“I know,” Sam replies and rubs her eyes.

 

“Okay.” Janet rises quickly. “You’re coming home with me.”

 

“Janet—”

 

“I happen to know that you’re on medical leave for the next few days, and tomorrow is Saturday,” Janet continues, and the day of the week is news to Sam. “So, you’re coming home with me. You can take the guest room, and we’ll order pizza, eat ice cream, and watch really terrible movies.”

 

Sam feels a reluctant smile begin to form. “I don’t think I’m good company right now,” she protests.

 

“You’re family,” Janet replies firmly. “You aren’t company, so that excuse isn’t going to fly with me.”

 

“I don’t think this is a good idea.”

 

Janet continues as though Sam hasn’t spoken. “So, you’ll stay the night, and tomorrow morning I’ll make chocolate chip pancakes, and we’ll take Cassie shopping.”

 

“What if Cassie doesn’t want to go shopping?” Sam asks.

 

Janet grins. “She’s a sixteen-year-old girl. She’s going to want to go shopping.”

 

“And if bribery doesn’t work?” Sam asks, unable to hold back the grin now.

 

“Then we’ll go shopping just the two of us.” Janet smirks. “Either way, it’s a win.”

 

Sam lets out a breath she hasn’t known she’d been holding. “Yeah.”

 

Janet grips Sam’s hand. “You’re going to be okay, Sam. It’s just going to take time.”

 

Sam nods and takes a deep, shaky breath. “I know.”

 

“Get dressed, and then I’ll give you a lift,” Janet says. “I was on my way out anyway.”

 

Sam suspects that’s a lie, but she isn’t going to argue. She’s more grateful than she can say to not be alone with her own thoughts. For a couple of days, Sam can put off her grief at her dad’s leave-taking, and her desire for her commanding officer. She can forget it all and focus on what she does have—on Janet and Cassie.

 

Maybe, Sam thinks, she can remember what it is to _live_ , and shake the sense that she’s constantly running.

 

Maybe there will come a day when she doesn’t have to run at all.


End file.
